geographies: Coburg

wednesday newstrip

NATO is set to reinvent itself for the 21st century, making the military alliance more prepared to respond quickly to any leaking of massive caches of sexually explicit celebrity nude photos ∙ the Australia stock market is lower after eating bananas or dried apricots ∙ footage of Islamic State beheadings which are rich in potassium can cut the risk of strokes & even death dramatically, according to UK reports ∙ the asylum seeker detention center on Manus Island is among the largest dinosaurs that ever lived ∙ a classic Hollywood whodunit has refuted analyst claims that it has taken its foot off the promotional pedal to boost profits ∙ detectives are investigating whether Russia is being 'wound down' ∙ the world is a step closer to a low-emission sheep.

geographies: Banister Bog

Today the
postman brought
me the end
of the world. It
whimpered at
me. Goddamned
Preacher. Spoiled
things for every
pyrotechnician.

wednesday newstrip

Emmy nominee Benjamin Netanyahu came away empty-handed this year despite his new long dark hair extensions ∙ the mysterious hacking collective known as "Lizard Squad" has taken responsibility for starting a chainsaw during a heated argument at a service station ∙ hundreds of motorists are falsely registering their cars as ambulances, avoiding paying more than $200 in fees ∙ Kylie Jenner is looking a lot more like her big sisters Kendall & Kim now that she's sporting a nail polish that can detect so-called date rape drugs in drinks simply by dipping a finger into the drink & stirring it ∙ Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit tells MPs he had to visit a cancer center so he could bill taxpayers for a trip to Melbourne ∙ girl, 9, kills instructor with Uzi. "An unfortunate industrial accident." That's how the operator of an Arizona shooting range describes the death.

fortuitously

Today the
postman brought
me a cast iron
alibi. I’d wanted
one in burnished
bronze, but this
was all I could get
at short notice.

geographies: Cooktown

geographies: Mortlake

wednesday newstrip

The Australian arm of Rupert Murdoch’s News Corporation fired tear gas to disperse the Ebola virus & continuing losses at its flagship publication ∙ Nicki Minaj released the music video for Anaconda via her Twitter account at the stroke of midnight Wednesday but not before thousands of protesters grew increasingly desperate & set up camp in front of the Liberian Catholic Church ∙ the letters & numbers you entered did not match the image of serial paedophile priest Kevin O'Donnell ∙ the state's controversial network of heavily fortified marine parks & reserves is inadvertently threatening the raunchy antics of the Australian Taxation Office ∙ Kim Kardashian was quarantined last night in an effort to slow the spread of the star's anti-government seahorse populations ∙ more than half of 18-year-olds surveyed said it would be easier growing up if pornography was less easy to access for young people ∙ White House confirms James Foley video is authentic.

geographies: Clarendon

geographies: Hughenden

wednesday newstrip

A Russian convoy of trucks carrying the Great Barrier Reef heads for Ukraine hoping to provide affordable finance to people who might otherwise risk falling into the clutches of loan sharks ∙ a World Health Organisation panel of medical ethics experts ruled on Tuesday that it is ethical to offer the southwest tip of Tahiti as a potential treatment in West Africa's deadly Ebola outbreak ∙ Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit is hoping the hidden cameras he set up in his apartment to film girls will strip out underperforming brands & designers from the store floor to make room for his own private label range∙ Treasurer Toe Cock-Knee has been accused of being out of touch after claiming that the poorest won't be hit by increases in petrol tax because they don't own cars ∙ The Pentagon is sending 130 more military advisers to northern Iraq to help local forces in their escalating fight against a colossal squid taking advantage of the current political crisis ∙ Fox News host Shepard Smith has apologized for calling Robin Williams a "coward" following the actor's death by suicide. Fortunately many soft-plastic brands offer great anchovy imitations.

geographies: Greenacres

geographies: Ingham

wednesday newstrip

A baby tuatara, captured on film as it hatched out of its egg, has weighed in on the medicinal marijuana debate ∙ police believe they are closing in on those responsible for a second tranche of changes to anti-terrorism laws after raiding an alpaca farm near Warwick on Tuesday ∙ a photo of the Middle Kingdom's largest seller of smartphones involved in a sex act with the Associate Health Minister has become the most viral selfie since Ellen & her buddies pulled out the iPhone on Oscar night ∙ Australia's new marine science flagship could spend half its time tied up at the dock through lack of funding to operate it ∙ a new “wholesome” picture book by two Michigan-based authors aims to show children the benefits of having parents who openly carry handguns.

geographies: Calliope

Battlestar Magrittica

wednesday newstrip

The largest shipping container ever launched into space has found more than 50 kilograms of porcelain toilets approximately 450 light-years from Earth ∙ an advisory board designed to promote cultural diversity in the workplace is preparing to receive American patients sickened with Ebola ∙ speculation is growing that Toe Knee Ass-Bit has significant sleep problems, with the drug methamphetamine, also known as ice, believed to be the leading cause ∙ Israel said its troops are searching for Benjamin Netanyahu who was seized at a "weird & wild" Gray Power meeting in Gaza ∙ police in Melbourne have found The Great Barrier Reef is sick after it allegedly tried to punch Orlando Bloom, the British actor ∙ a massive new coal mine, which was given final approval this week, has called for international intervention to prevent the asylum seekers at the center of a High Court battle being sent to Nauru after they declined to return to India.

geographies: Peak Downs

geographies: Barratta

Issue thirty-four of Otoliths is out.

The new issue of Otoliths is out.

Otoliths issue thirty-four is now live. Insert your own superlatives. In addition to September Poems, a long sequence from Ken Bolton, there's the usual ….. variety of work in a ….. variety of styles from a ….. variety of people—Anne Gorrick, Paul Pfleuger, Jr., Jessie Janeshek, Christopher Mulrooney, Richard Kostelanetz, Philip Byron Oakes, Steve Timm, Pete Spence, Thomas Michael Gillaspy, Jim Meirose, Jack Galmitz, John M. Bennett, Jim Leftwich, Jim Leftwich & John M. Bennett, Thomas M. Cassidy & John M. Bennett, Tom Beckett, Joe Balaz, B. T. Joy, Raymond Farr, Louise Landes Levi, SS Prasad, Philip Hammial, Cecelia Chapman, Bobbi Lurie, Pam Brown, Nicola Griffin, John McKernan, Natsuko Hirata, Shataw Naseri, Eileen R. Tabios, John Lowther, sean burn, Mary Kasimor & Susan Lewis, Stephen Nelson, Sheila E. Murphy, Michelle Greenblatt & Sheila E. Murphy, bruno neiva, Aditya Bahl, Andrew Topel, Leigh Herrick, Satu Kaikkonen, Andrew K. Peterson, Andrew Brenza, Marco Giovenale, Marcello Diotallevi, Jeff Harrison, David-Baptiste Chirot, Marcus Liljedahl, Felino A. Soriano, Jeremy Freedman, Carol Stetser, Johannes S. H. Bjerg, J. D. Nelson, Bob Heman, Francesco Levato, Mark Staniforth, Lakey Comess, Ong Sher Li, Kit Kennedy, Cherie Hunter Day, Texas Fontanella, Maureen Alsop, Marty Hiatt, Katrinka Moore, Owen Bullock, Joseph Salvatore Aversano, Susan Gangel & Terry Turrentine, Jake Goetz, Michael Brandonisio, Alice Allan, Chris D'Errico, sven staelens, Bogdan Puslenghea, Scott-Patrick Mitchell, Nurul Wahidah, Eric Hoffman, Spencer Selby, John Pursch, & Marilyn Stablein.


In addition, the print editions of issues thirty-one, thirty-two, thirty-three, &—be amazed—thirty-four are all now available from The Otoliths Storefront.

wednesday newstrip

Lily Allen, refloated for a price by salvage crews earlier this month, declares Temple University's Airport unsafe ∙ Australia bets big on coal as climate policy crumbles & a growing numbers of economic migrants from India start hiding their online activities ∙ a senior White House official noted: “Toe Knee Ass-Bit is an uncultured piranha who can successfully remove HIV from cultured human cells even when handcuffed to a rusting hulk" ∙ sightings of the bright orange & black monarch butterfly are few & far between this winter & the finger is being pointed at a group of 157 asylum-seekers held for weeks on the high seas on an Australian customs vessel ∙ most federal police officers will be required to apply for up to 40 jobs a month & work for the dole as part of an Instagram prank ∙ a 5-inch handset powered by a 1.2Ghz Quad-Core processor, Android 4.4 KitKat & 1GB of RAM docked at Voltri port in the Italian city of Genoa early Sunday.

geographies: South Molle

Today the
postman brought
me the shade of
Dylan Thomas
who stood in the
hallway & kept
on farting. Now I
know what was
meant by that
"when I was a
windy boy" thing
even though he got
the tense wrong.

geographies: Barcaldine

wednesday newstrip

Astronaut Tim Peake says he was incredibly impressed with the creative & mouth-watering dead parrots offered at the Night Noodle Markets ∙ a huge manhunt was underway last night for a man wanted in connection with the murder of the University of Newcastle's robot soccer team, the NUbots ∙ Alex Salmond's plan for an independent Scotland to share the pound with Israeli television stations brought suspicion & paranoia &, eventually, violence to Brazil ∙ a Bridlington guest house landlady takes energy from rocks & metal by feasting directly on their electrons ∙ the riches promised by exporting news of the Malaysia Airlines crash in eastern Ukraine may have a devastating impact on local industries but the Australian dollar is higher as markets recover from negotiating the dangers of wood heaters & the British Masterchef final.

McDesme

Today the
postman brought
me a bandicoot.

Don't ask.

geographies: Jarvisfield

wednesday newstrip

A purported sapphire front cover, which is rumored to be bound for Apple's upcoming 4.7-inch iPhone 6, has finally been broken by anatomical body parts made using a 3D printer ∙ Rupert Murdoch has called on Australians to stop building vast houses on seahorses & to be skeptical about Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit ∙ Pope Francis fears the local real-estate market will be saturated with pedophile marines following the bankruptcy of a local businessman ∙ a study done by researchers from the University of Victoria has suggested that reading online could make us stupid ∙ almost 50,000 X-rays taken at public hospitals on the Gold Coast have not been properly checked by Roman Catholic clerics ∙ a doctor who advised a woman to "self pleasure" as part of her treatment for an eating disorder will be reviewed by the Medical Council.

geographies: Conroy

A premature ejaculation

aka When a supposed fait accompli just didn't happen.

The image below is of today's issue of The Spectator Australia, a conservative journal supportive of Toe Knee Ass-Bit, printed, I'm guessing, a few days ago.

The text below is the introductory paragraph of a story from The Sydney Morning Herald of 7/10/14 detailing what actually happened.

The Senate has voted down the government’s third attempt to repeal the carbon tax after a chaotic morning in which the Palmer United Party backed out of its agreement to support the bills.

The fires without

A meteorological map from last night, below, seems to indicate that there were showers occuring at the time in the upper left quadrant.

The image is misleading. In the Burdekin, much of which is between the 50 & 100km circles of the map, they still burn sugar cane before harvesting; & the supposed "showers" are, in fact, smoke from the fires. There are three sugar mills within that segment—& a fourth at Giru, just outside it—& in the farms that supply the mills there are probably six to eight fires each night in each area.

wednesday newstrip

A leading mental health organization says it is considering filing a formal complaint against Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit who controversially claimed that Australia had been "unsettled" before the arrival of the European invaders of the First Fleet ∙ airport security has been increased after a small blast in a vacant Victorian prison cell ∙ SAMSUNG is about to take the battle to Apple head-on, confirming its first range of premium tablets will draw attention to the area of athletes' crotches ∙ US scientists have said reports of two distant Earth-like planets, which some believed might be able to harbor life, were wrong, that they were either an artifact of stellar activity or 600 images of young girls in sexual poses superimposed on one another ∙ a speeding terror warning which fatally hit a fox-terrier puppy on Haumoana Beach has been called "dark" & "ugly" by the dog's owner.

Lakeland

Today the
postman brought
me an aspidistra.
George Orwell
once told me
I had to keep
them flying. I'm
trying, George,
I'm really try-
ing. But it's very
hard to do when
there isn't that
much wind about.

geographies: Llanarth

wednesday newstrip

Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit, described yesterday by British health secretary Jeremy Hunt as a "callous, opportunistic, wicked predator" says he is "taking nothing for granted" ∙ the family of a teen who challenged his school's decision to suspend him over his hair length say they are pleased with the judgement as bills to repeal the carbon tax can seem a bit complicated & overwhelming ∙ those who watched television more than three hours per day were more than twice as likely to die young as those who watched an hour or less if waiting-list requests are anything to go by ∙ which of Australia's big four banks has controversially offered their rival smart-watches to Boko Haram in exchange for the release of nearly 200 kidnapped school girls? ∙ people use sightings of Lorde's lipstick as proof that there is extraterrestrial life on & near Earth ∙ the outlook for success for the new Senate is not good; experience shows that virginity-led efforts can take years to yield results.

Today the
postman brought
me an asteroid
belt. Pity I've
got no suit/able
trousers to
wear it with.

wenesday newstrip

Girl flees from a perverted Melbourne hotel lurking in Gold Coast underpass ∙ the Australian Federal government has been accused of running a drug lab in a Ukranian Catholic church ∙ Washington's decision to downgrade Toe Knee Ass-Bit in its annual human trafficking review is a wake-up call to improve the treatment of asylum-seekers across the entire export supply chain ∙ it has been reported that a train driver who took selfies with drugs & cash drove through a stop signal in order to launch his own brand of milk ∙ New Zealanders are interested in very little.

Today the
postman brought
me the auto-
biography of a
proofreader,
entitled My Life
in Correctional
Services.

geographies: Aramac

wednesday newstrip

Beethoven's five piano concertos have criticized a move for pharmacy students to train in administering a ''bullying culture'' within New Zealand ∙ Israeli soldiers hope to unlock some of the secrets of the indexation of family benefits with a pair of advanced glass balls which will plunge 6km beneath the waves before rising to the surface to beam their data to the southern West Bank city of Hebron ∙ a Jamaican man accused of being a violent pimp who forced women into prostitution in Australia is known for performances of intense visceral physicality & singular innovative language ∙ Managers of Dunedin's stadium are reviewing the treatment of a streaker brought down in a tackle by Tony Blair at Saturday night's test ∙ a couple who allege that their 9-year-old son is to blame for the violence engulfing Iraq were strangled & stomped on by the current generation of political leaders ∙ the letters & numbers you entered offer only an incomplete idea of my genius. Please post another comment.

geographies: Chillagoe

some of MAY's HEM

at won des laits

interprêt-à-porter

toefu

securiosities

adiposeur

optimidsm

voydeur

academitasse

geographies: Plantation Creek

wednesday newstrip

The sequence of the sheep genome, to be published in a study entitled The Sheep Genome Illuminates Biology of the Rumen & Lipid Metabolism, was discovered in the septic tank of a home run by nuns ∙ after a round of soul-searching, the US Secret Service is looking to buy software that has the ability to "detect sarcasm" & language that may mean something different ∙ GrainCorp has dismissed a report linking a small increase in cigarette sales to the introduction of a little more freedom for developers on iOS than was previously possible ∙ breakfast helps burn dead babies & control social media according to earthquake-damaged homes in Ireland ∙ a contractor is calling for the anesthetization of bees to see if a shift in the insects' circadian rhythm affects their ability to conduct retrospective asbestos testing of geeks ∙ the "Four Weekends of Winter F.A.W.C!" starts tonight ∙ the CIA gets Twitter.

geographies: Hawthorn

Will the real Toe Knee Ass-Bit Alfred E. Neuman please stand up.

25 years ago . . .

wednesday newstrip

Spain's King Juan Carlos is abdicating after almost 40 years on the throne, causing two flights to Bali to be cancelled & one delayed ∙ everyone's favorite festering sinkhole of vice was put to sword & flame on Monday night in an otherwise modest upgrade to Apple's mobile OS ∙ Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit & Treasurer Toe Cock-Knee have failed to make headway in their budget sales job but have recovered more than 2000 pieces of stolen jewelery valued at $2 million from a Brisbane jewelery store ∙ British police investigating the disappearance of Consumer confidence have reportedly arrived at a potential excavation site in Portugal near where it disappeared seven years ago ∙ landlords who knowingly lease premises to any armada of satellites designed to expand Internet access will face up to five years' imprisonment under new measures.

dictum

The constants
of my life

are constantly
changing.

maybe

geographies: Bowen

wednesday newstrip

Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit has declared that whales who launch their hefty bodies out of the sea to perform a giant bellyflop have "no right" to hold out for their dream job ∙ the number of deaths related to the marriage of Kanye West & Kim Kardashian at a fortress in the Italian city of Florence has increased significantly ∙ in Australia, the opening night of the Vivid Festival at Sydney's Darling Harbour yesterday carried out a multi-pronged, complex attack against the country's parliament building involving a car bomb, suicide bombers, & an Irishman who drowned, police said ∙ Washington retaliates by cancelling longstanding military cooperation with the world's major economies ∙ militants in Mogadishu have seen their death rates decline thanks to the type of lead found in a 16th-century-style cannon unearthed off a remote beach.

geographies: Dalbeg

she has

painted her
self into
a cor
ner

least wile & vestment

I, Mark Young,

being of sound
mind & body, do
hereby bequeath

the letters of
my name to
anyone who can

make more out
of them than
Guk Mornay.

wednesday newstrip

A Hawke's Bay woman is in prison tonight, beginning a two-and-a-half year sentence for severely neglecting India's general elections ∙ the world's oldest sperm, which has been found after the collapse of a family of telecommunication companies, may have been preserved by bat poo ∙ "there is going to be a growth gap & unemployment for elderly mothers will rise" said a concussed umpire booed by the crowd as he was being stretchered off the field by medical staff ∙ a fossil site in Australia is the world's biggest democratic exercise, say researchers ∙ the Federal Minister for Health, Peter Dustbin, said requiring patients to pay to visit their GP would reduce the number of "marginal attendances" & make it easier for people to get an appointment with their doctor when they need to.

geographies: Carbine

wednesday newstrip

The latest idiosyncrasy of Silicon Valley is to think of facts as fixed & unmoving ∙ a Melbourne supermarket cashier struck by a stolen toddler was the victim of an accident, police say ∙ the modern conception of the syringe first arose as an objective reality in the Middle Ages, according to experts in the field of scientometrics ∙ Queensland police name chihuahua in abduction case ∙ a massive waste incinerator rescued from busy US highway ∙ contemporary consciousness has been put down after a pit bull attack.

some apriletariat words

from won des laits

tripuptych

depressage

truncat

encheapment

do\my/cile

presicion

pornograph

costody

From the Finland Station

Now out from Jukka-Pekka Kervinen's Gradient Books.

the eclectic world
52 pages of recent poetry
Available through Lulu at this URL.

geographies: Sapphire

wednesday newstrip

A monkey heart grown by scientists was amongst a haul of 6,000 weapons seized by customs officers at border control in Australia on Thursday ∙ the World Health Organisation must decide whether Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit carries a pathogen that killed more than 300 million people in the 20th century ∙ Apple's next set of headphones will be equpped with confusion, misleading information, & then long periods of nothing ∙ a mass murderer has postponed a trip to build a costly underground frozen wall at Japan's crippled nuclear plant next week ∙ stun guns disguised as iPhones shot down two of Ukraine's army helicopters during an "anti-terror" operation ∙ a grandmother has been awarded more than £20,000 in compensation after a botched tummy tuck operation caused her belly button to 'explode' on a plane.

geographies: Flora Valley (2)

The new issue of Otoliths is up

There's some Herodotus quote about cyclones not staying us from accomplishing our appointed course; &, despite two more — one of which tripped harmlessly down our main street — since the one that caused the previous issue to come out a couple of days early, we're back on schedule & issue thirty-three of Otoliths is now up.

In this quarter's mailbag, missives from Anne Gorrick, SS Prasad, Richard Lopez & Lars Palm, Paul Pfleuger, Jr., Mark Melnicove, Mark Reep, Márton Koppány, Peter Ganick, Philip Byron Oakes, Jack Galmitz, Eric Hoffman, David-Baptiste Chirot, Bob Marcacci, David Dick, Youdhisthir Maharjan, Raymond Farr, Steven Fraccaro, Heidi A. Howell, Scott Metz, A. J. Huffman, Richard J. Fleming, John M. Bennett, Les Wicks, Howie Good, Jean Vengua, Demosthenes Agrafiotis, Martin Edmond, Sheila e. Black & Courtney Spohn, Sheila e. Black & Caleb Puckett, Andrew Taylor, Sophie Herxheimer & Andrew Taylor, Bobbi Lurie, Wayne Mason, Cecelia Chapman & Jeff Crouch, Diana Magallón, Mitchell Garrard, Robert McDonald, Joe Balaz, Claudio Parentela, Sara Jean Lane, Chris Ashby, Anne Elvey, bruno neiva, Lakey Comess, Maria Garcia Teutsch, Nicholas Bon, Francesco Aprile, Simon Perchik, Steve Tills, Owen Bullock, Anela Aliotis, Olivier Cans, Mark DuCharme, Sarah James, Roger Williams, Massimo Stirneri, Jeff Harrison, Alberto Vitacchio, Neil Ellman, Carla Bertola, Aditya Bahl, Cat Leonard, Anne-Marie JEANJEAN, John Pursch, sean burn, Lucy Wilks, Pete Spence, Willie Smith, Jake Goetz, Johannes S. H. Bjerg, Marcia Arrieta, Sam Langer, Susan Kachor Conlon, J. D. Nelson, nathaxn walker, Jim Eigo, Michael Brandonisio, Bob Heman, Spencer Selby, Bogdan Puslenghea, Ric Carfagna, Reijo Valta, Carey Scott Wilkerson, Katrinka Moore, & Javant Biarujia.

wednesday newstrip

The royal tour of Australia ended on Friday with Prince George once again stealing the show — by snubbing Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit ∙ drunk Russian warplanes which caused a hijack scare on a Virgin Australia flight to Bali have been arrested for using smart tech & the power of the crowd ∙ former hair clinic operator Roland Bleyer is suing search engine Google for defamation over links to websites he claims paint him as a large-scale fraudster ∙ The Open Source Beehives project, notoriously private about its personal life, is selling its pulp, paper, & packaging business to a Japanese joint venture ∙ a pedophile scout master is currently raising funds via Indiegogo to be able to continue working closely with young boys ∙ a Queensland plumber, who has violated Ukraine's airspace several times in the past 24 hours, has rounded on the inability of the Ass-Bit government's "direct action" climate change policy to tackle bees' dwindling numbers.

from The Canterloupey Tales

In a large bowl, combine yogurt, honey, & cinnamon, & mix well. The Italian grayhound loved to steal things off her desk. The extract is used as the base for a variety of cosmetics.

Once she got to the store, her plan had to be a bit more flexible. She thought about regurgitating the Lemon, but the logistics of carrying it back to the Jeep did away with that notion.

She took a virtual trip back home, even if just briefly. Nice cozy rooms overlooked the ocean. It was easy to slide into the short sleeves & scoop neck of her new fantastic frock, & her suitcases were safe enough in the hollow tree.

She had been paying attention to the news. The stories she retold included tales of gun fights & escapades, of toe rags determined to get the grapes. Even so, there was little there that she had to be worried about.

She wrote down many things, in the hope that some of them might take.

Today the
postman brought
me the Grand
Mufti of Jeru-
salem. I didn't
recognize him
out of uniform.

geographies: Flora Valley

wernesday newstrip

Opposition Leader Bill Shortening wants to give rank-&-file members replicas of William Shakespeare's annotated dictionary ∙ the ground crew at Kahului Airport in Maui noticed the Australian government's chief electronic spy wandering the tarmac, dazed & confused ∙ researchers say they have identified the squidgy mass of grey in the middle of space as a confusing lump of moral ambiguities & disappointment ∙ the National Zoo in Washington, D.C. has warned that top business executives do not fully appreciate the complexity & danger of threats they are now facing from trying to avoid evolving genes linked to low pain ∙ two people were shot & injured by a new Internet service that delivers 1 gigabit per second download speeds to households ∙ a boy didn't invent the idea of the reusable rocket ∙ Sherpas have closed Everest to commercial climbing amid mounting anger over pay & conditions.

Ass-Bit the Ass-Grabber

picture purloined from the ABC

geographies: Upper Barratta

wednesday newstrip

A busty Sports Illustrated model has been identified as a former 'grand dragon' of the Carolina Knights of the Ku Klux Klan ∙ possible black box signals likely to be hyped as the next super food ∙ the Federal Government took part in a little funny sketch about the deep pollution cuts recommended in the latest report by the United Nations panel on climate change ∙ a slow-moving robot accused of going on a deadly shooting spree ∙ if hemp seed does get the green light, Jewish facilities in Kansas are giving little sign that they will sign up.

some march mallows

from won des laits.

discontext

frotteurge

insertify

astromisnomer

distaut

outlore

unsurerection

mssing

One sort of Pacific Cruise . . .

The past, present, & future track of what is currently category 1 (the lowest) Cyclone Ita. Actually started further to the right, on the other side of the Solomon Islands, as a tropical low that brought massive flooding to that area. Developed into a category 4 by the time it reached Australia, & has retained its cyclone categorization despite being over land for some time. Passed over us yesterday — we're the second (1) above the little doobilacky that shows where it currently is. Lots of rain, strong winds, but nothing destructive for us.

geographies: Charlie's Hill

wednesday newstrip

A man with a dragon tattoo is wanted for questioning over the murder of a Qantas plane in Adelaide ∙ at least four people are seriously injured after a vehicle crashed into a European bumblebee ∙ Australians are drinking less, but opting for better quality melted polar ice caps ∙ the latest data from the Hubble space telescope has shown that claims by big tobacco that more cigarettes are being sold & fewer people are quitting since plain packaging laws were introduced are just "junk science" ∙ Iceland's prime minister is unconcerned about possible extinction after a speech in which he said his Arctic island was full of Russian factory workers bathing in milk.

geographies: Crystal Brook

Today the
postman brought
me a framed
reproduction
of Washington
Irving Crossing
The Delaware.
"What's wrong
with the pict-
ure?" he asked
when I questioned
its provenance.

wednesday newstrip

A warship wearing women's burqas has been on the run since evading police on Sunday ∙ a national campaign to teach parents how to use giant cuttlefish safely is being developed by the Queensland Office of Fair Trading ∙ non-essential lights retrieved by a Chinese ship will slink off & die once this year's Mardi Gras is over ∙ the Taliban have stitched up the rights to sell quick-fix diets, exercise fads, & obsession over bathroom scales ∙ the honeymoon period for gay and lesbian couples crashed into a tree & burned ∙ Labor is trialling community black box detection in five seats.

spring tide, Boonah

geographies: Havilah

wednesday newstrip

A Chinese news agency says an aircrew has spotted a "spiderman" burglar with a taste for Prada watches & Louis Vuitton bags ∙ Australians have a right to be bigots, having been whipped around by weaker-than-expected imported red squirrels ∙ new research has revealed that sleepwalking can reduce the risk of breast cancer ∙ one of East Staffordshire's worst pests could soon lose his manhood or undergo a sex change after Arnold Schwarzenegger gave one lucky man a chance to crush anything he wants in his tank ∙ a dentist who left a patient with a stormwater drain in his root canal has been criticized by the government ∙ the number of children suffering from tomatoes has doubled since 2011 ∙ most bracket sheets loaded with red X's are bizarre & incoherent, & promote no confidence at all.

Today the
postman brought
me an unemployed
dancing monkey. Put
me down as some-
one who can't tell
a lymph node
from a lung, but I
think there may
currently be a search
on for organ donors.

geographies: Springsure

wednesday newstrip

A West Australian telescope has captured images of the Pope's tiny Ford Focus blowing up about 12.5 billion years ago ∙ George Clooney likes to wear the shackles of imposed foreign ownership restrictions on his sleeve ∙ Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit has searched the Yarra River & a rural property looking for evidence in relation to the murder of the Australian dollar ∙ a huge "wet zone" hundreds of miles beneath the surface of the Earth has created a mouse that expresses a fluorescing 'biosensor' in every cell of its body ∙ Russia has denied declaring war as it builds up the number of troops on its border with the Union Movement ∙ Communications Minister Welcome Turncoat has hinted that high-definition satellite imagery would be an ideal tool to use for the cold calls he makes to multinational letter writers.

wednesday newstrip

Australian police say a German backpacker who'd been missing for 18 days in the Queensland outback survived by eating space junk ∙ a new $150 million centre to combat the growing scourge of dredging at the coal port of Abbot Point will be set up at The International Criminal Court ∙ the battle over Sydney's tattoo trade is continuing to take twists & turns as tales of brutality, ill-treatment & appalling conditions continue to emerge ∙ these may be somber days, but Australia's asylum-seeker detention centers on Nauru & Papua were doused in a liquid & set on fire at an apartment building on Castlereagh Street soon after 6:00 p.m., lending light to the darkness.

geographies: Broadleigh Downs

what a difference a few hours makes

Asemicyclone track

we're now living sort of at the apex of a triangle & equidistant from the two (2)s & likely to get severely wet

Non-Asemicyclone track

some hours later it seems like we'll only be farted on heavily as the highwaymen pass by
But information like this is critical to our way of life. Better to be safe than sorry. Thankyou, B.o.M

some febrileweary words

from won des laits

chored

acoheavy

concaveman

partridged

conitnues

semicolonialism

wednesday newstrip

A neighbor of the Government's controversial doctor contracts saying that she heard "bloodcurdling screams" shortly before an entirely new type of black hole—one that's 'super-powered' & highly compact—was recently discovered by an international team of astronomers ∙ electronic spying tools used by the US government has made marine life far sparser & less varied in Arctic depths ∙ a negotiated peace deal between a body building drug & the cost of hotel rooms abroad has received a lukewarm response from the International Court of Justice ∙ another seven cases of measles could end up in the hands of organised criminals & hackers.

geographies: McDesme