Saturday, December 28, 2013

where ignorance
      is bald

'tis follicle to
      be wise

Thursday, December 26, 2013

thursday newstrip

Three icebreakers are on the way to Kim Kardashian who has become wedged in Antarctic sea ice celebrating her first Christmas as leader of the world's 1.2 billion Roman Catholics ∙ one of the companies set to get a boost from the deal that Apple signed with China Mobile last night has spent a lifetime guiding yachts into the big blue, overcoming monster seas that flattened rivals & achieving feats no one else has managed ∙ the flu vaccine took to Instagram & Twitter on Tuesday to urge people to shun pride & selfishness & ended up provoking travel chaos at one of the busiest times of the year ∙ Pope Francis is less effective for men than women, & researchers at Stanford University believe the reason behind that is hormonal ∙ widowed people are reporting higher levels of wellbeing than married couples.

Friday, December 20, 2013

What, I asked, is the active ingredient? & could you please sign it for me. I find pseudo-chemical such a hard language to follow without help.

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

tuesday newstrip

Scientists are hailing the first complete 3D map of the unpleasantness of Australian high school students ∙ the number of violent attacks on British PM David Cameron's ping-pong & culinary adventures in Chengdu has shot up to more than 173 every day ∙ a medical device has admitted she made a mistake by re-tweeting a highly offensive message from a fossilised leg bone ∙ Kim Jong Un, who suffered head injuries when he was allegedly punched in Bali, has woken from a coma & announced he wants to pour billions of pounds into the HS2 rail line between London & the North ∙ controversial air defence zone has admitted acting as a circadian clock, limiting food intake to specific times of the day ∙ Npower has been forced to make a grovelling apology to 3.4 million customers for the appalling service they received this year.

Sunday, December 15, 2013

some found postman poems

Today the
postman brought
me this completely
killer canvas creation
from the King of
Cool himself. I
fucking love it. Try
not to be too jealous.

Today the
postman brought
me a pair of
these eccentric boots
from v ave shoe repair
online sale. How much
more scandinavian
can you go?

Today the
postman brought
me a letter from
Google, saying
they'd like to pay me
my AdSense money
in the form of
advertising for my
website—meh, no
ta... plain ol' cash
will do, thanks.

Today the
postman brought
me my order from
27th nov. The
pomade has taken
a very long travel.
Now I'm happy
to be able to use
this superb pomade.

Today the
postman brought
me yet another
of your sweet
gifts. The two turtule
doves that arrived
today are adorable,
& I'm delighted by
your thoughtful &
generous ways.

Today the
postman brought
me a proper
letter! With a

Friday, December 13, 2013

Its complex and pessimistic theme of a spiritually-failed man is told from several, unreliable perspectives and points-of-view (also metaphorically communicated by the jigsaw puzzle) by several different characters (the associates and friends of the deceased) - providing a sometimes contradictory, non-sequential, and enigmatic portrait. The film tells the thought-provoking, tragic epic story of a 'rags-to-riches' child who inherited a fortune, was taken away from his humble surroundings and his father and mother, was raised by a banker, and became a fabulously wealthy, arrogant, and energetic newspaperman.

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

tuesday newstrip

Tories in Suffolk reacted badly late Saturday to the "terrible message" that the NHS says its electronic diaper can help reduce incontinence ∙ Brisbane has officially become the G20 host city just in time for the start of the charity event season ∙ a red Porsche will make an historic statement to the House of Commons about the importance of lifejackets ∙ plain tobacco packaging has confessed to "hostile acts" against North Korea ∙ the House of Lords has been accused of costing taxpayers nearly £20m hiring consultants to ensure Cristiano Ronaldo remains los Blancos' finest ∙ increased availability of Iranian oil could disrupt the dynamics of gay marriage & the cherry market ∙ Kim Kardashian defends her mothering abilities.

Sunday, December 08, 2013

Saturday, December 07, 2013

Today the
postman brought
me the Swiss Cheese
calendar for 2014.
I've sent it back
because it was
full of holes.

Thursday, December 05, 2013

so_me nova_mber pwoe_rmds

from won des laits








Tuesday, December 03, 2013

tuesday newstrip

Irish troops fired on by Silvio Berlusconi ∙ a communal latrine of fossilised faeces has been found to date back 240 million years ∙ less than half of all people suffering from Justin Bieber are being formally diagnosed because doctors fear stigmatizing their patients ∙ telescopes saw the still unfinished reactor disappear behind the star, but only tiny, leaping, amphibious fish re-emerge ∙ diehard fans of PlayStation finally got their hands on the next generation Syrian rebel units ∙ Boris Johnson says he "never, ever wanted to be a gameshow host" ∙ Rio Tinto's decision to mothball performance-enhancing graffiti production at its loss-making Italian newspaper site has polarized much of the community, with those in favor being labeled as liberal hippies & those against as rigid & old-fashioned.