Wednesday, September 27, 2017

wednesday newstrip

JahRed Kushioner used private email account for Wheat House business · archaeologists uncover proof of how ancient Egyptians built the Great Pyramid with help from Kylie Jenner's 'baby bump' · new order from DoNuts T®ump indefinitely bans almost all travel by the Australian Christian Lobby & evacuees from the potential Mount Agung eruption in Bali · a NASA spacecraft just used Precedent T®ump's private golf club as a slingshot, but there were some major strings attached · fish have personalities, study finds.

Saturday, September 23, 2017

Today the
postman brought
me an abacus.
"Does it still
work?" I asked.
"I wouldn't count
on it," he replied.

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

wednesday newstrip

What shape is that galaxy? Here's a likely model — Sydney bride holds out a DoNut bouquet on her wedding day · Consent condoms' confusing DoNut-themed packaging appears to promote rape by including a DoNut instead of spelling out Do Not · Melbourne man has cyanide poisoning after self-medicating with apricot kernels to stop his cancer · illegal miners boast of 'massacring' uncontacted Amazon tribe · 'Fluffy' the shark to be returned to the ocean · your future sex robot could be hacked & programmed to murder you.

Sunday, September 17, 2017

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

wednesday newstrip

DoNuts T®ump 'jealous of Kuwaiti ruler's plane because it's bigger than his' · plastic surgery addict left with permanent erection after botched nose job · model proudly flaunts monobrow · Nintendo can't promise you'll get an echidna for Christmas · Equifax says support for same-sex marriage may have affected 143 million in the US · Stiff Banana, DoNuts T®ump’s former chief strategist, dished on how the resurfacing of T®ump’s 2005 interview with Billy Bush last October served as a “litmus test” of who was & wasn’t loyal.

Sunday, September 10, 2017

Wednesday, September 06, 2017

wednesday newstrip

T®ump returns to Harvey-hit Texas telling reporters he had seen "a lot of discount Aldi garden furniture" in the devastation the storm left behind · Melbourne families brawl over five rare Campbell Island ewes & unborn lambs slaughtered as North Korea detonates sixth & most powerful nuclear test · inside Europe's most exclusive, debaucherous nightclub, sperm chill out when their bloke is high · a Chinese tourist whose efforts to perform a breast implant procedure on a beauty salon manager resulted in her patient's death has been charged with manslaughter · three far-right activists who staged a mock beheading in protest of plans to build a mosque have been found guilty, convicted, & fined of a criminal offence under Victoria's racial vilification laws · Nobel laureate Malala lashes Suu Kyi's silence on Myanmar killings.

Saturday, September 02, 2017

Tooth Function

Cutting & crushing
& curved back-

wards. Much like
fan blades with a

rigid, hybrid de-
sign. Keeps the

mouth cool. Like
menthol. Turns

the tongue numb.
On demand.