wednesday newstrip

A monkey heart grown by scientists was amongst a haul of 6,000 weapons seized by customs officers at border control in Australia on Thursday ∙ the World Health Organisation must decide whether Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit carries a pathogen that killed more than 300 million people in the 20th century ∙ Apple's next set of headphones will be equpped with confusion, misleading information, & then long periods of nothing ∙ a mass murderer has postponed a trip to build a costly underground frozen wall at Japan's crippled nuclear plant next week ∙ stun guns disguised as iPhones shot down two of Ukraine's army helicopters during an "anti-terror" operation ∙ a grandmother has been awarded more than £20,000 in compensation after a botched tummy tuck operation caused her belly button to 'explode' on a plane.