wednesday newstrip

Prom Minister Toe Knee Ass-Bit has flagged further efforts aimed at securing Australia's borders amid growing concerns about an outbreak of Hepatitis A caused by frozen berries imported from China ∙ Ass-Bit also called on Australian farmers to put aside their pride, jealousy, & self-interest & instead exercise charity by carrying out the executions of the Bali Nine drug smugglers ∙ a young man found stabbed to death in western Sydney illustrates the risks involved with imported food, police believe ∙ the female judges of The X Factor warn of terrorism attacks if nine-year-old Milla Brown, who was born a girl, but loves Batman, & rocks a short haircut, asks the world to call him a boy.